Washington Lawyer - January/February 2025 - 27

FEATURE
get the job I thought I would get, but that didn't mean I wasn't going
to get any job. There was indeed a great job out there, but I just hadn't
found it yet. I took that rejection as an opportunity to revise my cover
letter, strengthen my interviewing skills, and apply to other firms. Today
I am so grateful I did not get that job because it led me to my current
one, which I love.
Now, several years out of law school, " thank you for saying no " continues
to be my mindset as I navigate my legal career. It's a mindset that can
also help others, too. After all, everyone has experienced rejection and
unexpected turns at least once (if not
more) during the various stages of their
legal journey - passing the LSAT, applying
to law school, passing the bar exam,
securing the first job, and practicing law.
My experience also led me to start a
podcast called - you guessed it -
Thank You For Saying NO, where I interview
people about how they have found
redirection and protection from life's rejections.
My guests talk about how they
are thankful for the rejection because of
what the experience taught them about
themselves and the opportunities it led
them to.
THE MINDSET IN ACTION
In one episode of Thank You For Saying
NO, I spoke with two attorney guests,
Stefan John and Jason Weiss. We discussed
the inherent point of the " thank
you for saying no " mindset, which is that
Turning negative situations into positive ones is not easy. And it certainly
does not take away the frustrating emotions that come with rejection
or disappointments. What makes matters more challenging is that life
doesn't always give us the time we need to process our emotions, especially
when practicing law. If it's not an imminent deadline, it's back-toback
meetings and court appearances all day or a last-minute task that
needs to have been completed yesterday. Before you know it, you can
feel emotionally bogged down by all the no moments, rejections, and
unexpected outcomes piling up.
The mindset is about recognizing
the importance of being adaptable
to life's unexpected turns, that we
can come back stronger, and that the
no isn't personal.
we have the power to turn a no into something positive. Recognizing the
" no moments, " as we call life's rejections on the podcast, can teach us
valuable lessons if we take the time to reflect.
The mindset is about recognizing the importance of being adaptable to
life's unexpected turns, that we can come back stronger, and that the no
isn't personal. It's about recognizing that the rejection could very well be
protecting us, that if something isn't working out, maybe it's time to reassess
and try a different approach. It's about recognizing that rejection
can and will lead to the right yes.
As frustrating as it can be when situations do not work out how we anticipated,
we have the power to turn the negatives into positives. For example,
if you don't pass the LSAT or the bar exam on the first try, take it as a
learning opportunity to work on the areas that need improvement and
have the mindset that you'll come out stronger the next time around.
If you don't get into your dream law school, think that there is a better
school out there for you. If you don't get your dream job, realize that maybe
you were being protected from something there. If you don't get the
promotion you were hoping for, maybe it's time to reevaluate and go
somewhere you will be more valued. If you did not win a motion, what
did the judge indicate were the issues and how can you make a similar
motion stronger next time? If you did not win a case, what are the lessons
learned and how can you use those lessons to improve the next case?
We have to be proactive about scheduling
time in our busy calendars for activities
that ground us. Whether it's exercising,
trying a new hobby, meditating,
journaling, therapy, traveling, or whatever
else, set aside time in your calendar
for just that. Treat it like a meeting you
can't reschedule. When you take time
for yourself, you'll notice a positive difference
in how you feel, an increase in
your overall well-being, and a better
ability to deal with no moments. I know
this to be true for myself.
We are not alone when we go through
no moments. I guarantee that if you ask
a colleague, friend, or random person
on the street if they have experienced
rejection, the answer will be a resounding
yes. Everyone goes through rejection.
It's something that connects us.
If you're having a no moment, maybe
reading this will give you a little hope.
Remember the last challenge you overcame? Use that as evidence that
you can get through the challenge that's in front of you. And remember,
we get better at dealing with no moments the more we run into them.
We get better at adapting to the unexpected turns that come with the
territory of being in the legal profession. One day you too will look back
and realize everything worked out better than you thought it would.
Let this be a reminder that you are closer to saying " thank you for saying
no " than you think! You have the power to turn the no into something
great.
Kenya Rothstein, an environmental attorney barred in Washington, D.C., and
California, works at Aqua Terra Aeris Law Group.
<<< Kenya's experience inspired her to
launch a podcast called Thank You For Saying
NO, where she interviews guests about how
they've found redirection and protection from
life's rejections.
JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2025 * WASHINGTON LAWYER 27
Washington Lawyer - January/February 2025

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